


Trans Tommy

by Corrie3



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Bad Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Exile, Gen, Self projecting lol, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Trans TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), binding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:07:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 19,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29327535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Corrie3/pseuds/Corrie3
Summary: Tara doesn’t want to be a girl, does she? When Dream finds a chest full of binders what will happen?I just update it whenever I get some inspiration.TW: Self harm, Suicide, Panic attacks, Transphobia.These are in most chapters but other odd ones will be at the top in the notes.
Comments: 84
Kudos: 368





	1. A Quick Authors Note

So this is my book about Tommy if he was trans. (ftm). There won't be any shipping because I understand it can help people with trauma but it isn't for me.

There are quite a few trigger warnings so don't make yourself suffer, I recently have been asked to add a summary at the end of each chapter so instead of re-publishing each chapter its going to be in the comments for the last paragraph for the chapters up to "Before" then it will be at the end. 

Also thank you everyone for the support I would never have thought this fic would get this much attention.


	2. What’s in the chest?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW:Panic attack, Transphobia, Self harm, Blood
> 
> First updated chapter, it’s much better now
> 
> Also thank you @legacyZ for the tip on what pronouns to use

Tara had never felt so betrayed and alone, she wanted a beach party and only Dream turned up. He thought that Tubbo at least regretted exiling him a little bit, even Ghostbur left him after handing out the invites.

She heard a woosh as Dream cam out of the portal, this was normal by now he would come and hangout with her so she wasn't lonely.

"Hello Tara!" Dream waves at her as he walks up the path, Tara waited knowing what would happen next. Dream brought out his shovel and began to dig down, Tara knew she would have to part with her stuff again. To be honest she didn't know why she tried anymore, she would get new armour and then Dream would blow it up.

Dream finally dug four metres deep when he hit something wooden, Tara looked at him with panic when she realised where he was digging.

"Tara, I told you not to hide anything from me." Dream says looking up at her.

"I... Please... Please don't look in the chest Dream..." Tara looks back down not wanting to look at Dream.

"Tara, you and I both know I can't do that." Dream digs up the final layer of dirt, he then reached down towards the chest. Tara in panic slaps Dreams arm out of the way, Tara looks back at Dream with complete fear in her eyes.

Dream drew back his hand and looked at Tara straight to her eyes, Tara quickly looked away; "Tara, I have done so much for you." Dream begins before pausing to think. "I am your best friend, in fact your only friend and you hit me?"

"Dream, please I didn't mean to. I am so sorry, don't hurt me please..." Tara continued with her apologies, while Tara was distracted Dream opened the chest and pulled out tank top looking things.

"Tara what are these?" Dream of course knew they were binders, Fundy happily showed everyone when he got his. Tara still looked down at her feet and stayed silent. "TARA, ANSWER ME WHAT THE F#CK ARE THESE!"

"Binders..." Tara murmurs. 

Dream grabs her chin, and forces Tara to look at him. "Speak up."

Tara looks at him in fear, as blood begins to drip down the side of her cheek. "Binders."

"Do you think you're a f#cking boy Tara? You know this is wrong, imagine if everyone back at L'Manberg knew." Dream smiled a bit as an idea came to his head. "You know what will happen if you run now?" Tara shook her head, well as well as she could with Dreams hand still squeezing her jaw. "I will go back to L'Manberg and tell everyone about you." Dream let's go of her jaw and puts the binders in this pockets.

"Follow me now."

"Of course, Dream."

—————

Tara felt sick, the only thing that kept her sane was now gone. She had been questioning her gender since she was eleven, before Fundy even came out, and the binders were part of that. She couldn't bare to use different pronouns for herself, she felt as if she was faking all of it.

The vision came back two her of the binders being thrown into the lava, one at a time until all three were gone. She wanted to return to the nether, join the binders in the sea of lava.

The thought of that let a tear began to fall down her cheek, why was she like this? Why couldn't she be normal? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

She let out a choked sob, and her body began to shake. Her hear stuck to the tear tracks, why couldn't she be a boy? A cis boy? She didn't want to transition because she was scared, but she felt so sh#t about her body it was almost necessary.

Her nails, that were too feminine mad their way to her arms. She traced the scars that were there, she then began to scratch at them leaving the blood to fall to the floor. The blood kept rushing out of both of her arms, she began to feel slightly light heard before she feel back and got knocked out from the contact.


	3. Shut up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Self Harm is implied, Blood
> 
> 2nd Chapter redone!!!

A figure with pig looking features slowly made their way across the icey land, they were walking through a spruce forest trying to find out what was beyond. Because the forest a expanded so far, they were taking their horse this time.

The spruce slowly began to turn to dark oak and they kept their eyes and ears open, for if something was going to jump them. The dark oak forest didn't last for that long, and slowly a clearing was seen.

As they came into the clearing, he took their horse to a stop. They brought their hand to their head to look around, in the distance was a few structures that were unrecognisable from where they were.

They slowly trotted their horse forwards, the structures getting closer and they were able to tell what they were. There was a tent and a small wooden fence, made out of logs dug into the ground. They decided to head towards the fence first, after all they might get more clues from there.

They dismounted their horse and tied them to one of the many logs. There was a sign on the outside that read; 'Logstenshire.' They then headed inside the fenced off ring and saw another tent, beside the tent was a camper-van type of thing. They saw a log around the back of the ring, after reading the sign you would know it was a religious symbol.

They then turned to the barrels, despite having almost everything they could want they were hoping to find a hint. After going through the barrels he found lots of blue, they chuckle as if this was funny to them before leaving the area.

They then went up to the second tent, this one didn't look as nice as the last. It had a sign outside reading 'Tnret.' They looked confused before turning to look into the tent, they let out a gasp of surprise. There was a girl lying in a pile of blood that seems to have come from her wrists, the figures expression changed they looked like they recognised the girl.

They picked her up and carried her over to their horse, they untied the horse and sat behind her to make sure she doesn't fall.

They took their horse to a gallop, trying to get the girl back as fast a possible. Blood was beginning to soak onto their white shirt, they looked at it almost considering something before focusing on the trip again.

————

Tara's eyes fluttered open, she rubbed them slightly before looking around. In panic she realised she wasn't at Logstenshire, instead she was in a cottage in the snow. She knew she had to get back to Logstenshire, Dream would put her to everyone. She quickly rushes to the door, feeling pain ripple through her wrists. As she grabs the door handle she hears steps coming up a ladder.

"Glad to see you up Tara." A monotone voice echoed through the room.

Tara flinched as she heard the name, she couldn't blame them though; she didn't even have another name. Tara turned around to see who's voice it was and doubled back in surprise, Techno?

"Tara, I can't let you leave you're hurt." Techno missed the flinched that Tara made again.

"How long have I been out?"

"Two days."

"F#ck." Tara muttered. "Techno, I really have to go."

"You were almost dead when I found you Tara." 

"I'm fine now though." This was a lie and she knew it, she couldn't bare to be with her brother any longer. And what if Phil came home?

"How did it happen?"

"I... Uh... Ummm... Don't remember." This was a lie Tara remembered exactly what happened, but knowing Phil he would probably be somewhere nearby so Tara wanted to get out of there. "Where's Phil?"

Techno raised his eyebrow, "Phil? Don't you mean dad?"

"He was a sh#tty dad."

"He's still your dad, just like how your still my sister." Tara flinched again, being called a sister felt so wrong.

"Where is he?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"I want to get out of here before he next comes."

"He should be back soon, he stays in L'Manberg most the time. He messaged me just before you woke up"

"Let me out Techno."

"You haven't talked to dad in so long, just stay."

"I would if he f#cking acknowledged my existence when I was growing up."

"What do you mean Tara? He cared about you more than any of us."

"Of course you remember it that way Techno."

"That was how it was, don't be so dramatic."

"Do you not remember when I was eleven Techno? Five f#cking months straight of wanting to talk to Phil, I still haven't told him and that is what led to what happened to me."

"So you admit you made those scars?" Techno said smirking slightly.

"F#ck off Techno."

"Phil didn't do that to you, you just said that you did."

"But do you know why I did it? Because Phil only ever cared about you, when Wilbur left for Esempe Live I had no one Phil was always with you."

"Tara you could have always not cut, don't blame it on Phil." Taras head snapped up to look at Techno, this made her mad.

"OH REALLY? LIKE WHEN THE VOICES DEMANDED BLOOD? YOU COULD HAVE NOT F#CKING BLOWN UP L'MANBERG AND KILLED EVERYONE IT SIGHT, BUT YOU STILL DID. L'MANBERG WAS MINE AND WILBURS WAY OF HAVING PHIL BE PROUD OF US."

"The voices Tara, they forced me to; besides I only spawned the withers, Wilbur did most the work."

"WILBUR WASN'T IN THE RIGHT STATE OF MIND, AND DID PHIL HELP HIM? DID PHIL GET HIM THERAPY LIKE HOW HE GETS YOU? NO THE SHUT THE F#CK UP TECHNO. AND DON'T PRETEND LIKE THE VOICES YOU HEAR ARE THE ONLY THOUGHTS THAT CAN F#CKING OVERWHELM PEOPLE."

Silence fell between them, Techno knew that Tara had a point. But that didn't stop him from glaring at her, but then both their heads snapped towards the door as it opened.

"What is going on in here?"


	4. Am I a bad dad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Panic attack, Ace bandages, Child neglect is referenced
> 
> Not me trying to rush update all these chapters to be better so I can continue to write.

The pair just stared in silence at Phil, they weren’t sure what to answer with.

"Kids, what's going on?"

Tara finally moves, giving Techno a glare before walking towards to door.

“Tara, you almost died two days ago. You’re staying here.” Techno now turns to Phil. “I’ll prepare the spare room, Tara is probably going to stay here until she recovers.”

Phil watches Techno leave to a door on the side. “Tara, I-”

"Shut the f#ck up Phil."

"Tara, you're my daughter I care about you."

Daughter, that word hurt her a lot. But what if she was faking it, Tara’s arm drift up to her chest. She then looked back at Phil.

“Then maybe you should have showed it” Tara glared at Phil before, Techno came back into the main room.

"Tara, your room is through there spare bandages are in the chest." He then gestured towards a door to the side.

Tara glares at them both and goes to her new room, she slammed the door as hard as possible. She flopped down onto the bed, her dysphoria was terrible from being called Tara for the last who knows how long.

She began to shake as she thinks back to when she lived with Phil, she didn’t want that to happen again.

"Dad, could I talk to you about something?" Tara asked. Tara was terrified she had been trying to tell her dad she thought she was trans for 5 months.

"TARA, HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU? I AM F#CKING BUSY."

Tears were pouring out of her eyes at the memory, she looked up at the mirror everything looked so wrong. Why was she like this? Is she even right about all this?

Tara sighed before she had an idea, she looked at herself in the mirror.

“Look at Tara, he is so cool!” Tara gasped in surprise, it felt amazing the only thing wrong was his name. Tara didn’t feel right, it felt terrible. He went through a few names he had always liked like; Josh, Joey, Tommy, Timothy and Corbin, (I am terrible with names sorry) He eventually decided on Tommy.

“Look at Tommy, he is so cool!” Tommy changed his expression to one of surprise, why hadn’t he tried this sooner?

The only thing left was his chest, well maybe other than his hair that reached his mid torso. But he didn’t want to cut it while he was still with Phil and Techno, he turned to the chest where Techno told him the bandages were.

He knew it was dangerous but he felt like sh#t, he slowly wrapped the bandages around his chest. He tried to make it as tight and flat as possible, he knew it would come back to bite at him but for now he didn’t care.

——————

Silenced say between them, neither of them was sure what to say next. Before Phil opened his mouth; “Was I really that sh#t of a dad.”

“No of course not dad, you cared so much about all of us.” Techno then began to think back to his argument with Tara, what had she said? Something about being ignored for several months. “Phil, Tara did say something though about her wanting to talk to you. She said she was asking for several months or something, I can’t remember though.”

Phil looks up at the roof trying to think back to when Tara still lived with him.

"TARA. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU! I AM F#CKING BUSY!"

"F#ck... Maybe I am a bad dad Techno."

"No you’re not Phil, you supported all of us."

“I supported you Techno, I yelled at her for wanting to talk to me. I don’t even remember what I was doing.” Phil puts his head in his hands looking down. “I am a sh#tty dad Techno.”

"Everyone makes mistakes Phil."

"Yes but, I should have learnt from them faster. It was killing both of them now I think about it, Wilbur even wanted me to kill him. I am the reason Wilbur committed suicide Techno.” Techno now had his arm awquardly wrapped around Phil, he was never that good at comforting people. “Techno, you saw the cuts on her arm right? Please tell me weather they were intentional or not.”

Techno looked down with guilt; “The were intentional...”

“I am an idiot Techno, I don’t deserve to be a dad.”

"Go talk to her." Phil looks up at him in and then back at the door, he then gets up and heads to her room taking a deep breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t bind with ace bandages try two sports bra and if possible put one backwards.


	5. Talk to me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: References child neglect
> 
> Really speed running through these chapters. This one is shorter than most of my chapters though.
> 
> DUDUDU

Tommy hears a knock at his door, he quickly slips a shirt on then opens the door. Phil standing there with watering eyes, as if he was about to cry.

"What do you want?" Tommy spits.

"To talk to you, please Tara."

"You already had that chance."

"Tara, I-"

"I don't want hear it Phil."

"Please Tara."

Tommy rolls his eyes and lets Phil in, "What do you want to talk about."

"What did you want to tell me?"

"There's a lot of thing I wanted to tell you, be more specific."

"The time when you were eleven."

Tommy took a deep breath, why did Phil want to know now? He was ‘to busy’ to be talking to him anyway. "OH F#CK OFF PHIL, YOU HAD A WHOLE FIVE F#CKING MONTHS TO HELP. OF COURSE YOU WANT TO KNOW NOW, I AM DOING THIS ON MY OWN. NOW GET THE F#CK OUT OF MY ROOM!" Tommy then took a breath to calm down, he was now staring daggers at Phil.

"Please let me help you now, I want to listen to you."

"I said I'm working it out mine own, I'm already probably further than you would ever let me go. Now get the f#ck out of my room"

Phil looked quite upset at the situation, but Tommy didn’t give a f#ck about Phil, He had his chance to help. Phil then stands up to leave Tommy alone.

Tommy pulls out his communicator and types in /w Ranboo. He was going to do this, Ranboo would support him, right?

TaraInnit  
Can you meet me at Technos the coords are **** ** -***

Ranboo  
I’ll be there as soon as I can

Tommy let out a breath when Ranboo didn’t ask why he wasn’t at Technos, that’s a story in itself.

He decided to find a book, after all Ranboo might take a while to get here. He looks at the shelf and picks out a book that looks interesting, it was called ‘Theseus’ Techno often compared him to Theseus so he may as well read it.

————

Ranboo came up to the house, it was snowing and the odd bits that got through his armour stung. He really didn’t want to turn up in full armour, but he hopes Techno won’t attack him. They didn’t know he was and enderman, no one did. Well almost no one, he wasn’t quite sure how but Dream somehow found out.

As he reached a clearing and saw a cottage with smoke coming out of the chimney, this looked like the place. He went up the stairs and knocked waiting for an answer. What he got was surprising for him though.

"Phil? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask the same." His eyes flickered to my armour.

"Sorry, I have a weird fear of snow. I can always take off my armour inside?" Ranboo tries to look around Phil to see Tara. “Where is Tara, she invited me over.”

"She’s through that door there, make sure to take your armour off though. Techno isn’t home at the moment, but he doesn’t like people coming to his house that much. Especially when they are wearing armour.” He gestured to a door around the back of the room, Ranboo then slipped past Phil and took off his armour before going to Tommy’s room.


	6. My name is Tommy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Self harm is mentioned, unsafe binding
> 
> DUDUDUDU

Ranboo knocked on Tommy's door until he heard a muffled 'come in'. Inside was Tara with a book in front of him, that was a sight Ranboo never thought he would see. He also noticed the bloody bandages on his wrists.

"Hey Tara." Ranboo then saw Tommy flinch quite badly as he said that, he panicked wondering if that was what Dream used to say to him. "I'm sorry, I didn't know that you didn't like that."

Tommy then looks at Ranboo in surprise, "You noticed that?"

"Yes, I'm sorry again I didn't want to hurt you."

"Ranboo have you ever felt trapped in your own body?" Ranboo looks at him a bit confused, and Tommy panics slightly. "I'm sorry it's a stupid question."

"It's not a stupid question Tara, I just never have felt like that."

"I don't want to be a girl anymore Ranboo, I want to be a boy at least I think. I don't want to be Tara." Tara choked up as they said 'Tara', Ranboo quickly put two and two together and realised why they flinched.

"So do you want to be a boy, like Fundy? How he was born in the wrong body?"

"Yea... I guess... Can you call me Tommy and uses he/him pronouns?"

"I mean I guess, Tommy is very funny and he is a great friend. He builds cobblestone towers that are much taller than him." Tommy's smile grew to take up pretty much his entire face.

"Thank you Ranboo, that was amazing." Ranboo then suddenly realised that they were at Technos, how didn't he realise that before.

"Could I ask why you're at Technos?"

"The stupid b#tch won't let me leave." Tommy sighs, "Says I am to hurt or something."

"How did you get here though?" Tommy looks down and Ranboo sees a small tear fall onto the duvet. "Oh, I'm sorry you don't have to tell me:"

"No it's fine, it's just that. Well. Dream would come visit me every day and force me to put all my stuff in a hole, and the place he chose would change. He chose an area above where I kept binders while I was still questioning." Tommy had a few tears coming down his check, he still went on though.

"He found the chest and opened it, he forced me to tell him what they were. He called me a little girl and that if I left he would put me to everyone. He then burnt all of them in front of me" He paused and let out a shaky breath, "He left and I had a small panic attack, I scratched at some old scars and reopened them and I past out from blood loss."

Ranboo was now holding onto Tommy like his life depended on it, "I'm so sorry Tommy." Ranboo then made small circles on Tommy's back while he cried into his suit.

"Ranboo how didn't you know I was trans before I told you? I broke the rule."

"I don't know Tommy."

Suddenly Tommy jumped back and held his ribs, Ranboo looked at him in panic. "I'm an idiot Ranboo, help please." Tommy then lifted his shirt to show bandages around his chest, Ranboo had talked to Fundy enough to know that this was dangerous.

Ranboo reached for a small safety pin he saw and unpinned it. He then turned around so Tommy could take it off.

"I'm good now."

Ranboo turned back around, to see Tommy holding his chest. Ranboo goes through his bag and finds his hoodie. “Put this on Tommy, it’s mine so it will probably be oversized enough.” Ranboo then looked up thinking, Tommy really needs another binder. But they aren’t exactly easy to get, but that when it comes to him. "I was thinking, I could ask Eret for a binder for you. I know that they have lots for when he goes to different servers to give to trans kids in need of one!" 

Tommy looked up at him, "You're a genius, please do that for me."

"What size do you need?"

"*insert size here*"

The next hour they were talking about before everything had happened, before Tommy was exiled. Ranboo even managed to tell Tommy a few Hypixel stories he remembers.


	7. I’m flat!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Chapter :)
> 
> Back at the speedrunning
> 
> DUDUDUDU

Ranboo walked up towards Eret's castle, he was sure this must be one of the best builds. Tubbo and the rest of the cabinet never really trusted him completely, he wasn't entirely sure why though. From the few times he had talked to Eret, he seemed like a great person. After entering the castle he went to the throne room, Eret was sitting there looking rather bored spinning his crown on his finger.

"Hey, Ranboo what's up buddy!"

"Tommy, wait no Tara came out as trans. He goes by Tommy now and while he was in exile Dream found out and burnt his binders."

"I have most of them in my storage room, but I do have a few by the door. I was going to head to Hypixel later today, so I had them prepared." Eret then led Ranboo to the door, and he saw a bag fill with white looking tank tops. "Did Tommy give you a size?"

"Yes, he said *insert size*."

"Who knows about him being trans? I don't want to out him" 

"Us two and Dream, Dream doesn't sound like he was being very supportive though."

"It's a shame Dream found out, he hasn't been the greatest after he found out I use any pronouns. Speaking of pronouns what does Tommy use?"

"He/him." Ranboo then puts the binders in his bag, he tried his best to somewhat hide them. "I guess I will see you later then Eret."

"Bye!"

Ranboo then pulled out the communicator and typed in /w TaraInnit, he pondered for a bit on what to type before deciding on something simple. 

Ranboo  
I got the binders

Eret supports you

I'm coming over now

Do you need anything else?

TaraInnit  
Nah, I'm good

Thank you so much tho

——————

Ranboo trudges through the now melting snow, trying to not hiss out in pain as the water managed to find its way through his armour. He wishes he could tell people about the whole enderman thing, but the Esempe wasn't exactly supportive of hybrids. Maybe he might be able to tell people eventually, but now is a terrible time.

He gets to Techno's door and knocks, he hears a rather muffled come in. Ranboo pushes open the door and sees the house empty, so he ducks through the door frame to get to Tommy's open door.

"Hey Tommy." Ranboo then puts down his bag and takes out the two binders, he then holds them out for Tommy.

"Hi Ranboo." Tommy jumps up at gives Ranboo a hug. "Thank you so much."

"Go on, try it on." Ranboo turns around and Tommy slips on the binder.

"I'm done." Ranboo looks back at Tommy who had a toothy grin. "Look at me Ranboo! I'm flat!"

Not even a second later they both hear from the front room.

"Tara, we're home!"

"Oh my god, those f#ckers." Tommy whispered to Ranboo glaring at the door.

"Are you ever going to tell them?"

"Yeah but they will be last, I'm going to get out of here and try to stay with someone else." Tommy pauses before looking up at Ranboo.

"Did Eret also not know about me being trans? Maybe Dream does care Ranboo"

"I don't know about that Tommy."

"What do you mean?"

"Why did he dig the hole in the first place?"

"He... no he has a reason, I would break his rules all the time. He would have stopped if I stopped."

"Why are there rules about a friendship? We don't have any rules."

"He has his reasons, please Ranboo he is my friend trust me."

"A friend would support you not burn your binders."

"He doesn't know how bad the dysphoria is though."

"Then he should've asked, you didn't deserve anything that he did to you."

"He came to my beach party, he was the only one."

"Yes well- Beach party? What beach party?"

"The one Ghostbur gave you an invitation for."

"No one got an invitation Tommy."

"What- Why?"


	8. Give them back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: I feel like there needs to be a trigger warning here pretty much Tommy thinks Techno is Dream. It is in Ranboos POV though so it isn’t described to much.
> 
> Pretty much a full dialogue chapter.
> 
> Continuing the speed run DUDUDU

"Why would he do that Ranboo? You must have forgotten."

"I don't forget stuff like this, I write it down. In fact, I have an entry about the day Ghostbur didn't come back." Tommy looks in surprise, before tears begin to form in his eyes as he realised that means Dream lied to him. Tommy wraps his arms around his middle as he rubbed his hands down Tommys back.

The door creaks open, and they hear a monotone; "Hello." Coming from the door.

"F#ck off Techno." Techno looks at them in shock, seeing Tommy crying into Ranboos suit.

"Tommy, are you okay?"

"I said f#ck off Techno."

Technos eyes scan the room and he sees the spare binder lying on the bed. "What are those?"

"I said to f#ck off."

"Not until you tell me what those are."

"F#CK OFF!"

"No."

"Techno he asked you to leave." Ranboo decided to butt in, he knew that Tommy wasn't feeling well enough to talk to Techno.

"Then I will take that, if I don't know what they are they could be dangerous." Tommy then tightened his grip on Ranboo, he looked at the binder at looked like ha completely zoned out.

"Don't burn them please, please I won't do it again."

"What won't you do again?" Techno looked at Ranboo confused, as if asking for an exlplanation. Of course Ranboo wasn't gonna give him one, Techno was being a bit of a b#tch right now to Tommy.

"DREAM, no please I need them. I'm not faking it."

"Leave Techno." He says again, Tommy was clearly not okay with Techno there. Why was Techno not noticing this and leaving.

"Tell me what's happening then I will."

"DREAM DON'T PLEASE GIVE THEM BACK I WILL GIVE YOU ALL MY STUFF PLEASE!"

"Ranboo, what is happening? She’s my sister, I need to know." Ranboo rolled his eyes at this, of course 'being a good brother.' Meanwhile the brother in question was screaming at someone who wasn't even in the room.

"Leave Techno."

"Fine" Techno then reached for the binder.

"NO DON'T BURN IT PLEASE." Tommy all of a sudden was back, yelling at Techno this time and not the Dream he was seeing.

"Why would I burn them?"

"Because I'm a fake."

Ranboo then pulled Tommy closer, "No your not faking anything. Dream was lying" He softly murmmurs to Tommy.

"What's he talking about being a fake, what are these?"

"Give them back to hi- them Techno."

"Not until you tell me."

Phil then walked up behind Techno, "What's happening, I heard yelling." Of course now Phil came, as if he can make him tell Techno and him what was happening.

Ranboo then looks down to Tommy, who was still crying into his suit. "Have Techno give it back."

"Phil can't force me to do anything."

"Give what back?"

Techno then lifted the binder to show Phil. "What ever these are."

Phil looked down at Tommy. "Ranboo and Techno leave."

"I'm not leaving Tommy with you."

Techno gives Phil the binder and rolls his eyes, he then squeezes past Phil to leave. "Ranboo leave, please."

"You really are a terrible dad, look at them their crying and shaking and you want me who is the only one giving them any support to leave."

"Fine you can stay." Phil looked down at Tommy. "Why didn't you tell me."

Tommy lifts his now tear-staind face to look at Phil. "I tried to."

"When?"

"It doesn't matter you're to busy with Techno anyway, it's not like you would help at all. In fact Ranboo listened to me more in two days than you did for five f#cking months."

"F#ck... is that what you wanted to tell me then?"

"Yes, you didn't notice the way I would flinch. You didn't notice my anxiety peak in a dress, you didn't give a f#ck about me." Tommy paused for a breath. "Now f#ck off Phil."

Phil tossed him his binder and then left. Talk about wanting to support your son.

Ranboo then had a plan come together in his mind, he turns to Tommy with a smile. "Hey Tommy, do you feel up to jumping out a window?"


	9. L’Manberg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Suicide is referenced

"What?"

"How do feel about jumping out the window, we could go back to L'Manberg and you could live with me."

Tommy smiled tear tracks still staining his face, he began to understand the plan. He would do anything to get out of this house. "Let's do it."

They both began to pack up all of Tommy's stuff, which was easy enough considering it was pretty much just a binder and a book. They both looked out the window getting ready, Ranboo then pretty much stepped out the window being 8'5 and all. He then grabbed Tommy and helped him reach the ground softly.

"Ok, we go to those mountains then then we come up with a plan there."

They begin to walk in that direction, Ranboo knowing that Tommy was still binding and shouldn't run. Once they got there Tommy realised something, that could completly ruin their plan. "I'm exiled from L'Manberg."

"No you're not, Tara is exiled but Tommy isn't." Ranboo then got out a small knife. "How do you feel about a haircut?" Tommy had been waiting to be able to have short hair for so long, and now he finally could.

Tommy turned around and Ranboo got to work cutting his hair. By the time he was done you could barley recognise him. "Thank you Ranboo, I feel amazing. But won't Phil know that I am me?"

Ranboo smiled again, "Not if he thinks you're dead. Here's a book and quill I always keep a spare one on me, write a suicide note or something we can leave at the bottom of this cliff."

To whoever is concerned,

I am so sorry for everything I have done, I think that it's my time to be gone. I feel so trapped and no one will accept me, I am sorry Tubbo for doing this to you are my best friend.

I have felt so useless recently, I don't think think I can continue much longer. I don't feel like eating most of the time I often slice into my skin. To be honest I don't even know why Ranboo stopped me the first time I almost committed.

I still care about you all,

Tara.

"Done." Ranboo quickly read over it before giving him a sad smile, he wrote it so fast it was as if he had practised in his mind or possibly even on paper.

"Ok, now we leave it here at the bottom of the mountain. I think there's a portal over there." They both walk side by side leaving the book to be found by either Phil or Techno.

————

"You know the story about how I found you right?"

"Yes I am Tommy and I was recently invited, you found me when you were collecting wood for L'Manberg."

"Ok let's go."

They stepped into the portal and there guts feeling like they are all being squeezed together and then separated again, but now they were in the over world.

"I haven't seen the smp in so long."

"Wait until you see L'Manberg!"

They both walk down the prime path Tommy pointing out new builds as they go along.

"What's all this red sh#t?"

"The Egg, Bad is creating a whole cult sorta thing around it. I think its called the Eggpire or something."

"Always knew he was a bit of b#tch."

Ranboo begins bursting out laughing as they approach L'Manberg.

"Wow..."

"Beautiful right." Ranboo then sees someone in the distance. "Aye, Tubbo come meet Tommy!"

Tubbo runs towards Ranboo. "We thought you went missing, what was that about?"

"I went to go collect wood because I want to add an extension to my house, I then found Tommy."

"Hello, Tubbo was it?" Ranboo could hear how happy Tommy was about seeing Tubbo again by his voice. Tubbo had a somewhat confused to look on his face though.

"I feel like I've met you before somewhere... Oh well, it was probably on Hypixel or something!"

"I'll take Tommy to my house, he can stay with me for now."

"Ok! Big Q needed me anyway." Tubbo then turns around and heads to the White House fiddling with his sleeves slightly.

Ranboo leads Tommy up to his house, Tommy looks around and goes through a few chests. "I know it's small but it's home! You can stay upstairs I have a spare bed across the room from mine."

"Can we go see Eret soon? I want to thank them."

"We can tomorrow, Tubbo has set a curfew so everyone can stay safe or something so we can't go out in five minutes unless we want to be put under house arrest." Ranboo pauses before leaning in closer to Tommy. "I think it has something to do with Quackity though, he seems to have more power over L'Manberg than Tubbo at the moment."

"Oh that's a shame, well I might just go to sleep now. G'night Ranboo."

"Good night, don't forget to take your binder off." Ranboo says chuckling a bit knowing what Tommy was trying. Fundy used to do the same a lot, so he got into the habit of telling Fundy and now he would do the same with Tommy.

"Dang it."


	10. Dream?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Transphobia
> 
> P.s. I’m trans don’t kill me
> 
> One more chapter to update before I can add new ones.
> 
> DUDUDU

When Ranboo woke up he turned to see Tommy still asleep, he decided he should probably ask Eret whether they could come over. He took out his communicator and typed in /w Eret.

Ranboo  
Hey can I come over with Tommy this morning?

Eret  
Sure dude! How did you get him out of exile?

Ranboo  
They don't know Tommy is trans

Eret   
Oh, why didn't I think of that?

"Tommy, wake up you have like ten minutes before we are gonna go see Eret." Ranboo whispers well skaing him softley.

A tired and slightly muffled "Okay..." is then heard from the pillow.

————

"Ready Tommy?"

"F#ck yeah!"

The duo walk through L'Manberg giving familiar faces a hello, and then continuing to the community house.

"I wonder what would happen if this was ever destroyed?"

"I doubt it ever will be Tommy."

"Wow..."

"Did it have the beacons before you got exiled?"

"No..."

Ranboo then grabs Tommy's arm and pulls him up towards the main door.

"Eret we are here!"

"One sec." Is heard then feet running down the staircase. "Hello Ranboo, Hello Tommy!" Tommy then runs up to Eret and wraps his arms around her bringing them into a hug.

"Thank you so much Eret."

"Aye no problem buddy." Eret then looks down at him. "How was exile?"

"Dream would come visit me everyday, in fact other than Ranboo he was the only on who came. He really was a great friend."

"Tommy... What were we talking about yesterday?"

Eret on the other hand was thinking about what Tommy had said. "Ranboo?" Eret says now looking at Ranboo. "Why did you visit him, you could have had the walls rebuilt."

"I... Tommy is a great friend and stopped me from having to leave with him."

"Ranboo found me on one of the worse days about to commit."

"Oh."

Silence fell over the three before Ranboo breaks it.

"Just so you know to get here we had to fake Tommy's death." Ranboo pinched his nose, in fustration at that being the only way. “So don’t worry if you hear that Tara died.”

Eret then brings them to the courtyard, the three sat in a comfortable silence watching the sky.

“Hey Eret? Have you seen Dream recently?” Tommy asks.

“No, why do you ask?”

“He said he was going to out me to everyone if I run away.”

“Oh Tommy... that’s terrible.” Tommy smiled weakly before looking back up at the sky. A voice is the heard from behind them.

“Eret?”

Tommy looks at where the voice is coming from in shock, he then grabs onto Ranboos arm as tight as possible.

“Hello Dream.”

“Who’s that?” Dream states sternly gesturing towards Tommy.

“That’s Tommy.”

“Ohhhh... I know what’s going on Tara is manipulating you too.” Dream smirks looking at Tommy. “I don’t want to kill you Tara, come back to Logstenshire with me. It will be just like the good old days.”

Tommy grips harder onto Ranboo. “My name is Tommy, not Tara.” Tommy says his voice shaking, then as an afterthought he added. “B#tch.”

“What do you think Tubbo will think of being best friends with a tr#nny.”

Ranboo clears his throat. “I think you’re are forgetting about Fundy and Eret.”

“Of course a hybrid and the king who betrayed him, perfect comparison to his best friend.” Dream scowls. If Ranboo is being honest that hurt him a lot to, he knew being a hybrid wasn't completely accepted in private servers but he didn't think anyone would be this open about it.

“Please don’t tell them Dream... Please... I will do anything.”

“Come with me Tara, come back to Logstenshire with me.”

“He’s not going sh#t with you Dream.” Eret butts in before Tommy can agree.

Dream scowls again and turns away to leave but pauses. “I see it was a mistake making you king Eret... We might have to change somethings around here.”


	11. Thank you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter so I am also gonna put out another normal lengthens one.

Dream left the castle and went to the nether portal, Dream was never sure why by the nether was always so welcoming to him.

Dream knew that if he outed Tara he would be seen as a b#tch, and it would be harder for him to get the disc from Tubbo. Dream groaned as he was trying to work everything out. Power was supposed to be easy, get Tommy exiled, manipulate him then use him to take power.

At least he still has Technos favour, he has an idea on what to do with it. Dream and Techno the unbeatable duo, he needs to frame Tommy for something to get him exiled again. He also needs to keep Ranboo away, he is the reason for his plan failing.

A smirk appears on Dreams face as he begins to form a plan.

————

Tears were now threatening to pour out of Tommy's eyes, seeing Dream again really affected him. Ranboo wrapped his arms around him and pulled him closer.

"You are so brave Tommy, you were able to confront him." Ranboo murmurs while rubbing his hand up and down Tommy's back, Ranboo decided to take on the role as Tommy's older brother for now.

Tommy began to sob into Ranboos suit as Ranboo just held onto him tighter. "Th-thank you Ra-r-ranboo." Tommy let out between sobs.

Eret sort of shuffled around before clearing his throat and saying a. "I need to go now, stay here as long as you like."

"Than-ank you."

The two were then left alone in the courtyard the only sound being the sobs from Tommy.


	12. Don’t be a p#ssy Tubbo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the second chapter it was also going to be short but I got carried away writing
> 
> While writing the summaries I realised this chapter needed trigger warnings so here;
> 
> TW: Suicidal thoughts, Self Harm

Tubbo was leaning over his desk and his eyes began to flutter open, he reached up to his face and felt dried ink. Tubbo yawned and looked at what work he had left, he was meant to do it last night but he was to busy thinking about Tommy. He must have met Tommy somewhere before perhaps in Hypixel?

A knock was heard on the door before it opened and Quackity peaked in. "We are having a meeting in a few minutes Tubbo." Tubbo just nodded in response, and rubbed his eyes.

"I'll be there, don't worry Big Q." Tubbo yawned out. Big Q smiled and left the room.

Tubbo looked at all the paper work he was supposed to get done for this meeting, he groaned and picked up the papers. He's been so caught up with all these politics and Tara that he began to forget to sleep.

Tubbo pushed the door open and began to head to the meeting room. His mind began to wonder once more, where has he seen Tommy before?

"Tubbo you're here finally, alright Fundy show him what we have been working on." Fundy then smiles and opens the book in front of him.

Tubbo's tired eyes drift down to the paper, he tries to read it but it all seems a little mixed up. "Fundy, uh Quackity could you please?" His mind went back to Tara, all the time she read him stories. Tubbo quickly shook those thoughts out of his head, and continued to listen.

"We execute Techno, we find his house and hold a public execution." Quackity smiles at their plan. Tubbo was confused why would they want to kill Techno?

"Why do you want to kill Techno?"

"He blew up this place Tubbo, he almost killed you!" Fundy tries to explain.

"He went into retirement, I don't want to attack him."

"Don't be a p#ssy Tubbo, you heard what Dream said. Techno was a traitor he deserves punishment." Quackity knew this would work, Tubbo was easy enough to manipulate and get what he wanted done.

"Fine... I'm not happy about it though." Tubbo then places down the papers on the table. "I'm sorry I didn't get these done, I was distracted."

"Don't tell me this sh#t is about Tara again, you were the one who exiled her." Fundy nodded agreeing with Quackitys words.

"We had a plan but you had to run back to your brother, you're no different than you're dad." Fundy states. Tears come to Tubbo's eyes and he turns to run out of the room.

He subconsciously begins to run to his bees, he was nothing like his dad right?

Tubbo leaned against a bee hive and lets the tears slide down his face. His hands find their way up to his horns, the thing that kept him connected to Schlatt. Tubbo isn't stupid he hears them whispering, but he is just a child who was put in charge of a country what else could they want?

He runs his hands up to his wrists, they were now scattered with cuts and scars. He thought he would be able to stop whenever he wanted but then it became an addiction, his only coping mechanism that worked. He didn't even feel like he was in charge anymore, both Quackity and Fundy had almost complete control over L'Manberg. Everyone thought it was him making these terrible choices that according to what Quackity says, is improving the country.

He wanted to give up on everything...


	13. It's not your fault

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mention of suicide

Techno looked out the window and saw a figure walking back to his cabin, once again Phil had returned without Tara. Techno sighed and looked back over to what was Taras room.

Phil opened the door, closer up Techno could now see tears pouring out of his eyes. "She's gone Techno... It's all my fault."

"It's not your fault dad, we can still find her."

"No Techno, she's gone gone. We won't be able to find her."

"How do you know?" Phil then put a book on the table. Techno opened up to the first page.

To whoever is concerned,

I am so sorry for everything I have done, I think that it's my time to be gone. I feel so trapped and no one will accept me, I am sorry Tubbo for doing this to you are my best friend.

I have felt so useless recently, I don't think think I can continue much longer. I don't feel like eating most of the time I often slice into my skin. To be honest I don't even know why Ranboo stopped me the first time I almost committed.

I still care about you all,

Tara.

Techno went over and let Phil cling onto him, together they both sobbed into each other's shoulders at the loss.

"What if she comes back as a ghost, Ghostara?" Techno asks through sobs.

"I don't know if she will like us that much Techno... She literally committed suicide because of me."

A silence fell between them as they thought about what happened. "It isn't your fault."

"If I had listened to her more Techno, she was right I never listened to her or Wilbur."

"Does Ranboo or Tubbo know yet?"

"I doubt it... I should probably go tell them..."

"You don't have to tell them know, you literally found out what happened ten minutes ago." Phil sighed at him then nodded not trusting himself to speak.

———

Tommy eyes closed now asleep in Ranboos arms, Ranboo looked at the time it was 8'o clock. The new curfew was at nine so he lifted Tommy up into a bridal style, normally he would wake Tommy up, but he has had a rough day.

Once he got home he lied Tommy on the spare bed and turned off the light. Why was Dream doing this to Tommy? There was no reason to was there? Ranboo sighed and decided to get some fresh air before curfew. Ranboo walked where ever his legs took him and that led him to Tubbos bees, where he saw a small figure hunched over.

"Hello?" Ranboo says not quite knowing who this was.

"Ranboo? Is that you?"

"Yeah, its me Tubbo."

"Ranboo answer honestly am I the next Schlatt?"

"No Tubbo, you did what you needed to keep as many people safe."

"I exiled Tara! My bestfriend I betrayed her..." Tubbo let out a sob and looked up at Ranboo, he could now see his tear stained cheeks.

"Tom- Tara missed you so much, h- they would have done anything to get back to you." Ranboo then smiled at Tubbo. "And you wanted to do anything to get them back." Tubbo gave him a pained smile before looking back down.

"I have to go now Tubbo, don't want to be put under house arrest you know." Tubbo let out a small chuckle. "But seriously Tubbo come talk to me anytime."

Ranboo turned heading back to L'Manberg, he knew that Tubbo blamed himself for everything that has happened. But Ranboo can't understand that, if he had stopped the fire sooner Tara could still be here. Ranboo then heard a snap from beside him and his neck snapped in that direction. Ranboo couldn't see anything so he begins to pick up his pace, but so does whatever was in the bush.

Ranboo then feels a hand cover his mouth and hears a voice from beside him. "It's a shame the prison isn't finished yet." Ranboo then feels something hit his head and while everything is slowly getting darker he feels himself being dragged away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect anyone to read this, let alone enjoy it thank you so much!


	14. This is my fault

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mentioned suicide, Misgendering, Implies past panic attacks.

Tommy woke up early that morning, he looked around. The last thing he remembered was being at Eret's castle, he must have fallen asleep. He looks across the room at where Ranboo should be, but the bed is perfectly made as if no one slept in it. Tommy then climbed down the ladder (How Ranboo got him up the ladder, he had no idea), still no Ranboo though. Tommy shrugged and took an apple, he must be outside.

Tommy pushed open the door to have a quick look around, his binder still not on. He sees Tubbo also looking for something, so he goes back up the ladder to put on his binder so he could help.

"Hey Tubbo!"

"Hi Tommy, have you seen Ranboo?"

"No he wasn't in bed this morning." he paused taking another bite out of his apple. "In fact it didn't look like he slept in his bed at all."

"I was talking to him last night, he said he was going home... I hope he is okay." Tommy just hummed in response not focusing to much. "Tommy have I seen you before? I feel like I know who you are."

Tommy gulped and quickly came up with a lie, "I used to play Hypixel a lot maybe you saw me on there?"

"Mmmmmm, maybe..." Tubbo then sighed and came up with a desicion. "Tommy do you want to come see Tara with me?"

Tommy wasn't sure what to do, he knew that Tubbo would find the pool of blood that has probably now dried in his tent. "Sure?" Tubbo smiled and grabbed Tommy's wrist and began to drag him to the portal. Tommy winced slightly at the pain that shot up his arm.

Tommy didn't mind the pain that much, being dragged around my Tubbo reminded him of before he was in exile, Tubbo alway showing him the next thing he was working on. 

They went through the portal, and began to walk over the small log. Tommy’s legs began to shake, he built this with Dream when no one came to his party. Dream, Dream was his friend right? Ranboo had to be wrong... Or was he? A tear began to slip down his face, he quickly wiped it away and quickened the pace to catch up to Tubbo.

“You good Tommy? Sorta froze up a bit there.” Tubbo giggled.

“No! I am a big man why would I ever do that?” 

“Sure Tommy.”

Tommy didn’t say anything, but his mind began traveling 100 miles a hour. Did Tubbo know? Was he just leading him there to leave him there once more? No Tubbo wouldn’t do anything like that.

They soon arrived at the portal and went through to arrive at Logstenshire.

“TARA! I am here.” Tubbo called out. Tommy began to feel a bit guilty about not telling Tubbo, but he had until he was ready right. “She must be in her tent, she named it Tnret for some reason.”

Tommy wanted to stop him from going in there, seeing the puddle of blood from his old scars. But he couldn’t, They then went around the corner to see the inside of the tent. Tubbo gasped and then looked at him. “Tommy, Tara she... she... what happened?” Tubbo let out a sob, and Tommy tried to remember what Ranboo would do for him when he panicked.

Tommy then awquardly put his arms around Tubbo and let him cry, Tommy felt so bad Tubbo thought he had died... committed suicide... He was fine if Phil or Techno thought that but Tubbo...

“It’s all my fault Tommy, if I hadn’t exiled her she wouldn’t have had to do this...” Tubbo let out another sob into his shirt. The two stood there for a while just letting Tubbo take in what happened.

“Tara, I told you that you would come back!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHHHHH I WROTE THIS SO MANY TOMES ANS IT WOULDNT SAVE


	15. Logstenshire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Blood, Gore, Transphobia, Child abuse.
> 
> This chapter made me question if I am okay.

Tommy turned around to see Dream with a very beat up Ranboo beside him, Dream was almost holding Ranboo up as if he would fall is he didn't. Ranboo was covered with bruises and blood was coming out of his once red eye, as he looked closer it had been completely removed.

"Let him go Dream."

"Or what?"

That question stumped Tommy, he had nothing on Dream. Absolutely nothing. He was useless in this situation, Tubbo was still there and after seeing what happened to Ranboo he couldn't let that happen again.

"Tara it is so easy... Just come back to me... You should never have left."

Tubbo looked up at him a little confused. "Tara is dead isn't she?"

"So you also believed the tr#nny." Dream stopped for a second to laugh. "Your an idiot Tubbo, 'Tommy' isn't a boy she is Tara a girl."

Tubbo looked at him confused still. "No, what do you mean Tara wouldn't fake being a boy." Tommy almost dropped him, as he went back. He wanted to get out of there but Ranboo... He had to get Ranboo and run, Dream was right Tubbo wouldn't support him.

He only had Ranboo and Eret, no one else would accept him. No one... At least he could try right? "Tubbo don't believe him please, I will explain it later please."

"Tubbo why would you believe her? You exiled her for a reason!"

"Tubbo, we need to get Ranboo and get out of here."

"Tom- Tara, I'm sorry but it's real sh#t of you to pretend to be a boy."

"Tubbo, I'm not a girl... Please I can't loose you..."

"Dream, leave Tara and Ranboo here and don't let anyone visit." Tubbo sighed before adding. "Not even you."

"Tubbo, I don't think that's a good idea. I have to visit him make sure he doesn't run."

"Dream, he can go anywhere apart from the greater SMP and L'Manberg. Her and Ranboo will be fine." Tubbo then turned his back and walked back to the portal.

Dream snarled before throwing Ranboo to Tommy, and followed after Tubbo. After they went through the portal Tommy ran straight to his old chests trying to find bandages, after grabbing them he ran back up to Ranboo and wrapped them around his head covering his eye. He knew he couldn't lift Ranboo who was 8'5ft, so he left him on the ground trying not to touch any of his bruises.

Tommy sighs before going to get a few extra pain killers and stuff for when Ranboo wakes up.

————

(This part is set after he was knocked unconscious a few chapters ago)

Ranboos eyes fluttered open, he was in a almost fully black room tied to a chair with rope. He felt something metal go to his neck and it slowly dragged along it, not enough to kill him but enough to draw blood.

"Good morning Ranboo."

"Who are you?"

"You know who I am Ranboo, you talk to me all the time."

"Tommy?"

"I'm not that f#cking tr#nny."

"Dream? I never talk to you."

"What do you mean, we talk all the time!"

"No, no we don't." Dream moved the knife to his arm and cut, Ranboo screamed out in pain as the blood began to poor out.

"Of course we do, now you are going to stay here with me..." Dream then moved in front of Ranboo and looked him in the eyes. "Or else..."

"No, I won't... Tommy needs me."

"Is that two rules being broken? I'm sure Tara told you all about those." Dream moved the knife to his cheek and made two cuts, once again Ranboo screamed as his tears ran over the cut.

"What are the rules?"

"You don't need to know them. But that is one more being broken." Ranboo braced for the cut but heard Dream walking away and let out a low sigh of relief, but then he heard water being run into a bucket.

Dream makes his way back over to Ranboo and slowly unties the ropes on his right hand, he grabs Ranboos hand and dunks it into the bucket. It felt like his hand was fire, Ranboo tried his hardest to not scream but eventually gave in. He didn't even know how Dream knew he was a hybrid, he was able to hide it every time he went out.

"Now we need to get to Logstenshire to wait for Tommy to turn up."

Dream undid all the ropes, Dream grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him onto a horse.

"Are we there yet Dream?"

"You'll see when we are, I'm sure you know the area better than you should." Dream thought about something for a second. "Actually I have an idea..."

Dream turned around and pulled out his knife, he raised it to Ranboos left eye. He slowly dug it into the eye socket and twisted it around the eye, and listened to Ranboo scream in pain. He then pulled out the eye hearing a snap, he then threw into a nearby bush. Ranboo then fell backwards unconscious and fell off the horse, Dream snarled and threw Ranboo back on and tied him onto the saddle.


	16. You transphobic b#tch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Implied self harm, Accidental self harm, transphobia, blacking out (I don’t know if this is TW but it makes sense to me.)
> 
> The last chapter didn’t quite go as plan so the plot is going to have to change, it’s going to be better this way though.

Tubbo goes through the portal he couldn’t bare to look at Ranboo again, he looked terrible. He didn’t want to hurt To-Tara but why would he fake being a boy? He wanted to listen to Tara and understand what she was saying, but he saw what Dream had done to Ranboo. He was quite fond of his eyes. 

Maybe Quackity and Fundy were right, he spent way to much thinking about her. Now that he knows how terrible of a person Tara was, he might be able to focus on work more. But at the same time he wanted to think about it more, talk to someone about everything that’s going on at the moment.

Who would he talk to though? I guess Eret but he hasn’t talked to her in ages, not since they betrayed him. Maybe Fundy? He worked with him so maybe he could understand and help him out? I mean he could tell Quackity, but he wasn’t the understanding type.

He exited the nether and went straight to the White House, Fundy was probably the best option. He went to Fundys office and knocked on the door, after a few seconds he heard a;

“Come in!”

Tubbo the pushed open the door to see Fundy sitting on the desk.

“Hi Fundy.”

“You good Tubbo?”

“Maybe?”

“Don’t tell me this is about Tara again.”

“It is but please listen.” Fundy just rolled his eyes in response.

“Whatever.”

“Ranboos hurt first of all, Dream cut him, gave him bruises, burns and even took out his eye.” Fundy scrunched up his nose at the eye part.

“So where is he now?”

“Exiled with Tara.”

“TUBBO!”

“No wait listen please, Dream then told me that Ranboo had been visiting Tara while she was in exile.”

“You told me this was about Tara.”

“Tommy is Tara.”

“What?”

“Tara thinks she is a boy.”

“No that, you’re telling me Tommy is ftm and you’re not supporting him?”

“What does that mean... Tara is pretending.”

“No, I’m pretty sure Tommy is trans like me. You really are like your dad a transphobic b#tch, you say you support me then turn around and say stuff like this.”

“But Dream said-”

“Who gives a f#ck about what Dream said, he deadnames me, misgenders me and calls me slurs all the time. Of course he is going to say Tommy is pretending. I’m going to talk to him now, consider me retired by the way.”

And with that Fundy stormed out of the room, leaving Tubbo staring at the door. What had he done? He didn’t realise Tara no Tommy was trans. 

He really is like Schlatt isn’t he? His legs take him to his office, and he subconsciously grabs the knife out of a drawer. He was used to this by now, though he had never touched his horns. He was to scared of the pain. He raises the knife up to his horns and almost begin to cut them off, when his door opens up.

“YOU B#TCH!”

“Quackity?”

“YOU ABSOLUTE TRANSPHOBIC B#TCH!” 

Tubbo begins to shake as the sound continues to echo around him, he drops the knife and it slices across his leg before dropping down to the floor.

“YOU SAY YOU SUPPORT FUNDY AND ERET AND THEN DO THIS!”

“I... didn’t know...” Tubbo shakily murmurs.

“WHAT BULLSH#T YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN WHY ELSE WOULD TOMMY FAKE THAT?” 

Tubbo continues to hear the shouting in his ears, slowly everything begins to spin and he fall and feels his head bump against his desk. The fells his arm be sliced by the knife again, and clatter away somewhere else. He then hears a door slam and the shouting stop before he blacks out.

————

Fundy storms out of Quackitys office after telling him, and heads straight to the portal. He had to talk to Tommy, and maybe see if Ranboos alright too.

The portal always made him fell sick when he went through, it was worse with a binder when his lungs were already so squished. All his organs felt as though they combined, and then released again as he went through. Fundy pretty much ran to the portal to Tommy’s exile, he had to talk to him.

Upon exiting the portal he saw, Tommy filling in a creeper hole ahead of him.

“TOMMY!”

“Fundy? What are you doing here?”

“Tubbo told me.”

“Oh... Why did you call me Tommy?”

“I believe you.” His breath was still fast, as he had just ran in a binder “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, I can’t say the same for Ranboo though.”

“Can I see him?”

“Yeah he’s just in front of my tent, I would be careful though.”

Fundy follows the path up to a white tent with a sign saying ‘Tnret’, out side is a body covered in cuts and a bandage around the face. Tubbo was right about what was done to Ranboo, he looked like a ghost almost.

“Tommy, wanna help me put Ranboo on the bed?”

“Yeah, I couldn’t do it alone.”

Tommy then comes around and grabs Ranboos ankles, then Fundy grabs his arms away from most of the cuts. One the count of three they then pick him up and place him on the bed.

“Tommy, would you mind if I built a house here?”

“Don’t you have a house in L’Manberg?”

“No, I left because Tubbo was being a little sh#t.”

“Makes sense, maybe you could build a house there.” Tommy then gestured to an area not to far from his tent. “I don’t know if you see the theme but a tent or camper-van would be best.”

“Yeah, I’m going to go collect some wool for a tent.” He paused before asking; “Is Ghostbur still here?”

“No he lives with Techno, at least I’m pretty sure.”

Fundy smiled and nodded before heading off into the field shears in had, to find sheep.


	17. Eret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Blood, (Sewing) Needles, Transphobia, Implied self harm
> 
> Also I don’t know anything about how the medical stuff would actually be done.

Quackity left the office heading straight to Eret, she would know how to deal with Tubbo better than he would. He didn't get it, Tubbo always accepted both Fundy and Eret; How was he able to fake this for so long?

As the castle grew closer, Quackity began to speed up. He reached up and adjusted the beanie that hid his hair. He was excited for this, finally giving Tubbo what he deserves. Tubbo had this coming, he was Schlatt. There was reason to deny it, they say like father like son for a reason.

Upon entering the castle he saw Eret almost standing there waiting.

"Hi Tommy, oh sorry Quackity I was expecting Tommy to come."

"Tommy is exiled."

"What do you mean?"

"Tubbo listened to Dream, who told him to exile Tommy. Also we found out that Tubbo is a transphobic piece of sh#t."

"Tubbo was very accepting of Fundy and I, why wouldn't he be with Tommy?"

"I have no clue, maybe he didn't realise Fundy was trans or thought you were cis?"

"So is he still dead naming him?"

"Yup, says that Tommy is f#cking faking it." Quackity could see Eret's surprised expression even with his glasses on, he's not suprised about Eret's reaction; No one thought Tubbo would be transphobic.

"I'm going to go talk to Tubbo."

"You do that, I'm gonna build a new house somewhere else."

————

Eret was approaching L'Manberg, she was very confused why would Tubbo be transphobic it doesn't make sense. Tubbo would always correct people when he was misgendered, or even when Fundy was dead named. What caused this twist of character?

They went up the stairs to the entrance of the White House, he saw Tubbos door hanging open. This worried her a little Tubbo almost never leaves his office open, they quickly walk over to the door and peaks in.

On the floor is Tubbo, he is surrounded by blood and seems to be barely breathing. Eret's eyes widen in panic, why would Quackity leave him here like this? He quickly picks him up and takes him through a door at the back of the office, she knows leads to Tubbos room.

They lie Tubbo on the bed and pulls out bandages, a cloth, a water bucket and some antiseptic cream.

He sees blood on the sleeve so he takes of Tubbos jacket, wincing at all the scars running up his wrist.

He dips the cloth is the buckets and then tries to clean away the blood without hurting Tubbo to much, she didn't want Tubbo to leave them he was on his final life. After cleaning up the cut on his arm they see how deep in actually is, it was almost as if Tubbo had fallen on the knife. Eret panics slightly knowing it needs stitches, he knew how to do this but she wasn't sure if Tubbo had a sewing kit. They lay the cloth on the cut while he goes through the chests, a sigh of relief is heard as she finds a sewing kit.

They grab the flint and steel in his pocket and light a small fire and heats up the needle to clean it of anything that could create an infection, she then threads the needle and turns to Tubbos arm.

They slowly creates a knot at one end of wound, then slowly and carefully sees the cut closed. After sealing the other end of the cut, he gets a bandage and wraps it around the now sealed cut. 

She then grabs a dagger and goes to Tubbos leg, the cut is to hard to get to so they cut the top of the pant leg off. This one isn't as bad so he just clears the blood then apples some antiseptic cream before bandaging it up.

She then leaves Tubbo to rest and goes out to his office, they grab the cloth and begin to try and scrub at the now dried blood. With the limited light in the room, coming from the small window proved difficult.

He then grabs the chair behind Tubbo's desk, she pulls it into the bedroom and sits it next to Tubbos bed. They then sit down next to him and drift off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very happy with this story thank you everyone for the support!!!


	18. His name is Tommy now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Referenced child neglect, Blood, (Sewing) Needles, Death, Gore
> 
> Two posts one day because I was bored

Phil knew he had f#cked up, he had neglected two of his children to the point of committing suicide. One of them he even made the final blow...

He was killing off his kids, all for Techno. Why did he treat them that way, he never gave them anytime. Phil trudged through the snow towards the forest, he wanted to get away from the house to think.

Tara was trans, he still didn't know her- their pronouns. Didn't even know if sh- they had a different name that they went by. He drew his sword and began to slice at the tree, he often saw Techno do this when the voices became to much. It helped a bit, but not enough. 

He went deeper into the forest, he just wanted to restart somewhere else. A place where he would listen and help everyone, not only one person.

As he went deeper the spruce trees became dark oak, so he drew his sword incase anything snuck up on him. It was difficult to be snuck up on being a hybrid and all, he had better hearing than the average person. But he hadn’t been able to show his wings in a while, so it was slowly becoming more and more useless. 

He knew there were hybrids on the server like Techno, Fundy, Tubbo and Schlatt, but there probably more that hid like him. Techno didn’t have to worry being the strongest and richest on the server, Fundy was born here and everyone was there when his ears grew in; and Schlatt forced Tubbo to embrace the horns or some sh#t.

He revealed his wings now, they were a jet black and spanned 4m in length. He didn’t think anyone would be out here considering Techno went quite a far way out, he knew Tara used to live around here. Maybe he could go visit his old house, it might help with the pain a bit.

He then heard a bush rustle to the right, and quickly turned and had his sword pointed out. Out of the bush he saw two arms come up and someone stand up.

“Fundy?”

“Heyyyyy Grandad...”

“What are you doing here?” He asks almost as if accusing Fundy of something.

“I was trying to find wool, and maybe got a bit lost.”

“Want me to take you back to L’Manberg? I don’t know how you got here though, L’Manberg is almost 3km away.”

“No, I am staying at Logstenshire with Tommy.”

“Tommy? Who’s that?”

“Tara came out as trans, almost everyone was supportive!”

“Can I see him? It is he/him right?”

“Yeah it’s he/him, the only problem is I am lost like I mentioned earlier.”

“I know the way, I just didn’t end on the best terms with Tommy exactly.”

“Lead the way.”

The two walked in silence until the trees began to thin out when Fundy turned to Phil and said; “I didn’t know you were a hybrid.”

“Oh sh#t, I forgot I had my wings out. Give me a minute.” Phil closed his eyes for a second, then his wings began to almost curl back into his body.

“Ouch, glad I never had to do that.” Phil just hummed along in agreement and walked out into a clearing where he knew Tommy’s house was.

“TOMMY! Phil is here.”

“Phil? Why the f#ck is he here?”

“Tommy... I am so sorry, I can’t say more than that.”

“Phil now isn’t the best time, Ranboo isn’t doing the best. I don’t want to have this argument now.”

“How is he?” Fundy asks.

“His breathing is a bit better, but I am running out of potions.”

“Can I see him? I know a bit about first aid.”

“Sure why not Phil, just leave right after. You can come back later if you want to talk.”

And with that Tommy turned and headed up to his tent, Phil following not that far behind. 

Phil peaked into the tent and doubled back with disgust; “Not pleasant is it?”

“Who would do that?”

“Dream that mother f#cker.”

“Is his eye okay? I can’t see it, it’s under the bandage.”

“Dream took it out.”

“Can I have a look? I have some sewing stuff in my pockets if need be.”

“Sure I’ll get out of your way.” 

Tommy then leaves the tent, leaving Phil to treat Ranboo.

Phil first looks at Ranboos lower pant leg, it was stained with blood and had several holes. These didn’t look to serious, and would probably need a bandage and antiseptic cream. The cuts on his arm looked a bit deeper, but again not quite deep enough for stitching. His hand was very burnt, it didn’t look like fire though so water and a bandage should be fine.

He then looked at his face, he slowly undid the badly tied bandages around his head. He felt sick with disgust seeing Ranboos eye socket, completely empty. He also had two cuts across the cheek, that did look like they would need stitches.

He didn’t have any antiseptic cream on him, which would be important to clean all the cuts and stop them from being infected.

He poked his head out of the tent to look for Tommy; “Tommy, do you have any antiseptic cream?”

“No, but I think Fundy might.”

“Do you know where he is?”

“Out looking for sheep, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you borrowed some for Ranboo.”

Phil shrugged the went to Fundys chests, they were outside of where a tent looked planed out.

He went through all the chests, finally in the last on finding some. It wasn’t much, but it had to be enough.

Phil went back to Ranboo and started with his lower legs, he got a cloth that was laying beside him and dunked it in a bucket of water. He cleaned off all the blood, around where the sores where and applied the cream. He could now see they were probably caused by berry bushes or something. He then wrapped the bandage around both of his legs.

The then turned to his face, he got a flint and steel and heated up the edge of the needle to decontaminate it. He then threaded it trough with ease, after all he was a single dad what would you expect. He then Tueaday a knot at one end of the first cut, he then slowly and carefully sewed it closed. He then closed it off and started again on the second cut. Finally he applied cream before applying a new bandage that also covered his eye, Phil could work on a eye patch later but for now he had to let it heal on its own.

Finally he went to his arm, he cleaned all the blood off with the cloth again. He applied the cream and wrapped a bandage around, he was getting faster as he did this.

Finally for his hand, he reached for the bucket and Ranboos hand and slowly lowered it in. Once the water was about halfway up his fingers a scream was heard and Phil jumped back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is by far the longest chapter so far, I won’t be posting new chapters for a while as I want to go through and edit older ones. I’m not happy with the way I portrayed a few of the characters, the story won’t change though.


	19. Enderchild

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Describing injuries

Ranboo looked around, he began to panic not completely knowing where he was. His hand felt like it was on fire, he looked down at it and saw his skin slowly peeling away. At least he thinks it was, he could only see as much as before and that made his depth perception worse.

He then looked to his right and saw Phil holding a bucket of water, why would Phil do this?

"Are you okay Ranboo?" Ranboo looked at Phil in disbelief, he had to have known he was half enderman somehow.

"Why did you do that Phil?"

"Your hand looked like it had been f#cking set on fire." Maybe he didn't know, maybe he was just overreacting to Phil trying to help him.

"How did I get here?"

"You'd have to ask Tommy that, I went for a walk after finding the note you two kindly left us and saw Fundy."

"Fundy is also here?"

"Apparently so, he said some f#cked up sh#t happened in L'Manberg." Phil paused to consider what he was going to say next. "Is your hand okay? It reacted badly to the water."

Ranboo quickly tried to think of and excuse, it wasn't working very well and with Phil looking at him it wasn't helping. Even though it wasn't eye contact it still made him freeze up a bit. That's when Phil decide to get up on the bed and tried to look at him in the eyes, Ranboo quickly looked down only to feel Phil's hand slowly push it up.

Ranboo then jumped backwards, they then fell of the end of the bed and began to roll backwards down the hill. Their jaw became loose like how and enderman would, this wasn't normal they would normally only flinch bit when they were hiding their enderman aspects. Not all of this.

"Ranboo?"

"⊑⟒⌰⌿ ⌿⌰⟒⏃⌇⟒."

"Ranboo, I can't understand you." Ranboo then panicked realising what that means, they looked down at their hands and saw the back and white. They must have run out of energy while being this hurt, tired, panicked and making eye contact was what finally sent them over the edge.

"⟟'⋔ ⌇⍜⍀⍀⊬." They looked down at the floor hand on their jaw, they were trying to fit it back to where it was normally.

"Ranboo are you an enderman?"

Ranboo consider answering for a second before deciding to admit it, it was pretty obvious anyway. "⊑⏃⌰⎎"

"You should get some rest Ranboo, I know how hard it is for hybrids." Ranboo just nodded it wasn't like Phil would understand them if they said anything anyway.

They grabbed some grass to help calm them before walking up to the tent, they then place it down beside the bed. They really tried to sleep but it wouldn't come, their thoughts were pre occupied by Phil.

They knew that Phil wasn't going to hurt them, after all he cared for Techno who was pretty much full piglin. But Techno was still slightly human, Ranboo wasn't even partly human. They could just make himself look more human, it just left left looking very white and sick most of the time when he did. It was from the other part of them that they forgot about.

The enderchild began to drift off to sleep hoping Phil, would keep their secret. Well of course they couldn't stop Tommy or Fundy from walking past and seeing them, but they didn't want anyone else to know if they could help it.

————

Ranboo woke up to their shoulder being shook, they looked up and saw Phil's eyes with sunglasses.

"Hey Ranboo, I don't know if I will be able to understand you but we need to wake up so I can test some herbs on you, it's to see if I can help with your hand." 

Ranboo rubbed their eyes a bit, they knew Phil wouldn't be able to understand them so instead they just closed their eyes for a second. The white side of their face then wiped across their face, to make it look very pale. "You should be able to understand me now, right?"

"Yes I can, could I ask what you were speaking?"

"Ender, it's the same language that all creatures you have found in the end speak."

"The End? What's that?"

"My home dimension, DreamXD doesn't let us go there. I once tried to get home and DreamXD was there and stopped me."

"DreamXD? Who's that?"

"They said that they were the protector of the Esempe."

"Interesting..."

"Anyway, I would be happy to go with you to try some herbs. I might not be to much helping to find them though, y'know one eye and all."

"Get ready first, we will probably go to Technos as he has pretty much any herb you could ask for." Ranboo hummed in agreement before going down to Ghostburs old tent, he remembers that he used to go their for food. He also wants to find Tommy and talk to him, as much as he doesn't remember about what happened last night he feels like Tommy was mentioned.

At Ghostburs tent he see a group of barrels that he goes through trying to find food, he feels like he hasn't eaten in days.

“Ranboo! You’re awake.” Ranboo turned around and saw Tommy.

“Yeah, I’m still a bit sore but I’m alive.”

“We’re exiled again, Tubbo was being a bit of a d#ck.”

“What happened?”

“Dream outed me to Tubbo, and he said stuff along the lines that I was faking it. Tubbo of course believed that b#tch and exiled both of us for letting me getting away with it.”

“Transphobic Tubbo? Never would have thought I would see that.”

“Neither did I or Fundy for that matter, he moved here with us to get out of L’Manberg when he found out.”

“Mmmm... Where is the food?”

“In that barrel around the back.”Ranboo went behind and saw the barrel in question with an apple drawn on it, he reached in and grabbed some bread that was surrounded by salt to help preserve some of the meats.

“I’m heading with Phil to Technos, he wants to try some herbs for my hand.” Ranboo then shows Tommy his hand, it was now clearly having skin being peeled back.

“That looks bad, what did Dream even do to you.”

“I think this might be the only time I’m thankful for forgetting, I only remember that I was in a lot of pain.”

“You better go up to Phil, he’s waiting by the forest.”

Ranboos nodded and went to where Phil was waiting, he was still eating the rather salty bread. Phil smiled and held his wrist and began to head into the forest.

“Dark oak forest can be dangerous, and don’t forget you only have one eye.” Phil whispered to him. Phil then closed his eyes, Ranboos was confused at first but then wings began to grow out of his back.

“I didn’t know you had wings.”

“I hide them, the same as you do. That’s how I know how terribly hybrids are treated, and why I am usually in my own server.”

“Can I?” He was referring to showing his enderman side of him, he was more comfortable now know Phil was like him.

“Sure, I’ll give you a second.” Ranboo then closed his eyes concentrating as the black came over his face again, he’s pretty sure he also grew slightly taller this time but he couldn’t be sure.

“⟟’⋔ ⍀⟒⏃⎅⊬” 

Phil nodded despite not understanding them and the duo headed off further into the forest.


	20. Eye Patch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Slight description of injuries, (Sewing) Needles
> 
> Longest chapter so far pog

The duo trudged through the forest, they didn't talk much considering Phil couldn't understand the other. Ranboo had never felt so free, they didn't have to hide anything and loose energy. People would often comment on how tired they were, this led them often having to try and come up with lies which they were terrible at. The snow began to appear and Ranboo hissed at the contact, they were sure burns would appear around their ankles. Phil looked over a little concerned.

"Are you alright Ranboo?"

"⏁⊑⟒ ⌇⋏⍜⍙ ⏚⎍⍀⋏⌇ ⏃ ⏚⟟⏁, ⟟'⋔ ⎎⟟⋏⟒ ⏁⊑⍜⎍☌⊑."

"F#ck I forgot you were an enderman, did Dream take your armour?"

Ranboo opened their mouth to answer before remembering, Phil couldn't understand what they were saying so they just nodded. Phil then opened his bag to pull out two boots that would cover their ankles.

"These used to be Technos, he made his own recently though and has no need for them. I was actually considering chucking them, I'm glad I kept them though." Ranboo just nods their gratitude and pulls them on, hissing slightly as some snow on the edges of their pants made contact with their skin.

They knew as the snow got deeper it would find a way to get into the top of the boots, but for now this was working fine. Well as fine as it could with still some left over water in their boot. They just hobbled on beside Phil, they slowly saw Techno's house appearing in the distance.

"⌇⊑⍜⎍⌰⎅ ⟟ ⏁⎍⍀⋏ ⏚⏃☊☍?"

"Sorry, I can't understand what you are saying." Ranboo sighs and they raise their hand to the black side of their face, as if they were hiding that side. Phil looked at them for a second before understanding.

"If you want to, Techno is obviously also a hybrid so he wouldn't care to much." Ranboo then considers it of course they prefer to be like this, but then again they can also be understood if they turn back. They eventually decide to turn back if they need to communicate when they are doing the testing, of course that they can't try to sign out.

They considered learning sign language before, but they only know the basics because they then realised almost no one knows it. Their tail then wrapped around their arm as they went up to the front door, if they were being honest Techno scared them a little bit. Phil knocks, well at least they think so they can't actually see the door very well.

They both then hear a; "Come in." and push open the door, Techno is on the couch sharpening his sword.

"Phil, you're finally back!" Techno pauses for a bit before eyeing Ranboo. "Is that that Boo guy Tara would invite over?"

"This is Ranboo, who Tommy would invite over."

"I'm confused."

"⏁⏃⍀⏃ ⟟⌇ ⏁⍀⏃⋏⌇☌⟒⋏⎅⟒⍀" Ranboo then internally kicks themself when they realise Techno can't understand.

"What Ranboo was trying to say, at least I think is that Tara is trans and is now Tommy." Phil pauses to consider what else they could have been saying. "Or he wants to hurt you."

Techno then looks at Ranboo noticing all the bandages and cuts scattered over them. "What happened to you? If you can understand." Ranboo then gestures to Phil to answer.

"Dream, f#cked him up." Ranboo then nodded to confirm what Phil had said.

"You did pretty well, why did you come here exactly?"

"Because as you can see Ranboo is pretty clearly a hybrid or in particular an enderman, so I saw a burn on his hand and thought is was from fire so I dunked his hand in water." Ranboo the raises their hand with the skin still continuing to peel, it was now about halfway up their fore arm and slowly growing. "Turns out that water causes a burning reaction and that led to water to get under the skin and slowly eat away at his arm."

"I'm sure I can work out some sort of potion... Give me maybe an hour?"

"That should be enough, I can also sew an eye patch for their eye in the mean time." Phil then leaves to the chest and pulls out a hand sewing set and some fabric. Techno goes down the ladder to a lower storage room, this left Ranboo awkwardly standing there.

"Ranboo, do you want anything particular on your eye patch?"

"⏃ ⋔⟟⌰☍ ⏚⎍☊☍⟒⏁, ⟟⎎ ⊬⍜⎍ ☊⏃⋏ ⍜⎎ ☊⍜⎍⍀⌇⟒" Phil looked at them again confused, Ranboo then pulled a bucket out of their bag and mimicked drinking from it.

"A water bucket?" Ranboo quickly shook their head, they then looked out the window and saw a cow and pointed towards it. "A milk bucket then? I think I can do that..."

Ranboo smiles before sitting down cross legged on the floor, watching Phil slowly hand stitch the eye patch.

Techno wasn't surprised Ranboo was a hybrid, he always seemed so tired and his lies were terrible. As good as they were with completely human members, any hybrid should be able to see it right away. He opened his potion chest and looked through what he would need, he grabbed nether wart right away as it would help balance the potion. There was a small bottle of ghasts tears that is normally used for regeneration, this would hopefully help new skin grow. He then grabs a tin of magma cream, he normally uses it in fire resistance potions so hopefully it would help evaporate the water. He then moves to the puffer fish, they normally are in water breathing potions, they create a bubble around the users head to help them breathe so hopefully it will keep water off while its healing.

Techno then grabs three water bottles, and fills them up out of a bucket in the corner of the room. He inserts them into the brewing stand making sure to screw them in as tight as possible so it doesn't leak at all, he gets the blaze powers and adds it into an energy compartment. First he adds nether wart to help balance the potion for when it is done, he watches the bottles begin to spin and mix it in. Next he drips in a few ghasts tears, and watches it slowly being added before he turns up the speed for the next ingredient. He gets the puffer fish and cuts it up, he gets the spikes and crushes it into a powder before adding it. He then reaches to turn down the speed to as low as it can go, he then a bit at a time adds magma cream.

He then leaves it for a while so the magma cream can be properly mixed in, the cream should also make it easier to apply to the wound. Because if it was more watery in won't stick to the skin as well. (Please don't make this weird)

After about thirty minutes of letting it mix he turns off the stand, and took off the potions. Techno then climbed up stairs to see Ranboo of the floor watching Phil sew, he smiled at the sight that reminded him of when he was younger.

"I've finished the potions, Ranboo you should apply it in the morning for the next few days. If it still hasn't healed by then come back to me, because as good as Phil is on the medeical side of things I'm better." Ranboo nodded and grabbed them they unclogged it now and rubbed it into their arm like sunblock, they hissed a bit when it made contact.

"I'll finish these last few stitches and then we will leave, I'll come back tomorrow if Ranboo is fine at Logstenshire." Ranboo was surprised at that, them? What about his own son, he was just exiled for the third time.

Phil tied the final knot in the stitch and held up the eye patch to show Ranboo, he then reached for their face and undid the bandage. Techno could now see the stitches Phil did across their cheek, of course also their eye. Even Techno felt disgusted anyone would do that to them, Phil them put the eye patch over their eye.

"We better get going Techno, I'll try to get back tomorrow morning.'"

"Tell Tommy that I'm sorry, I was just trying to look out for him."

"We will."

The two then headed back through the forest, this time at a faster speed wanting to get back before lunch. (A bird just flew into my window, its fine though) They pretty much ran back now that Ranboo was feeling at least a little better. As they got closer to Logstenshire they began to hear yelling and they both quickly turned back to their human or in Ranboos case human looking forms. As they came out of the clearing they could clearly hear Tommy yelling at someone, the rounded the corner to look into the wood fence and saw Tubbo, Eret and Tommy there.


	21. Please?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Implied anorexia, Thoughts about Bulimia, Self-Harm is referred to.

Eret opened her eyes and looked around trying to remember how they got into Tubbo's office, he then sees Tubbo in front of her and it all comes back to them. He see his chest rising and falling faster and healthier than before, Eret decided he'd probably wake up in maybe an hour or two.

Eret is quite concerned especially after all the other older cuts on his arm, her eyes go up to his horns where they can see a dent from where Tubbo was trying to cut them off. While not being a hybrid he still have white eyes, she was never sure why but they always hid them. He was treated how most hybrids were treated on the server by people who found out, they treated them like an object that was lower that them.

Eret then decides he should probably get a few potions ready for when Tubbo wakes up and maybe some food, she knew that L'Manberg kept their potions in the top room of the White House they just hope that no one took them when they were leaving.

After climbing the last ladder he sees several storage chests, going through them she found iron armour, sheilds that can no longer be used and old swords. They then go to the final chest and find a single potion of regeneration, while several would be better but he was sure she would be able to make do with this. They then go back downstairs to check on Tubbo again, he is still unconscious but better than before at least.

Eret then goes through Tubbos chest trying to find any food, all the chests are surprisingly empty. He looks to see if there are any markers for what is in each chest, she then begins to see small crayon drawings in the corner of each chest. They then go eventually find one with an apple and open it up, inside was a single apple that looks like it's been there for weeks.

Eret looks back over at Tubbo as he realised why there was no food, she can now see how small and fragile he had become. Eret knew it was hard to be President after all they often helped Wilbur being the only other adult in L'Manberg, but how had she forgotten about the fact Tubbo was a child. They should've been there for him, he knew more about politics then anyone else in the cabinet.

She looks over to see Tubbo coughing, he quickly rushes to help Tubbo up.

"Are you okay?"

"M'fine." Eret reaches over to the bed side table and helps Tubbo drink the health potion, they would probably want to keep Tubbo in bed today.

"Tubbo, when was the last time you ate?"

"Uhhh...The same day I passed out, it was that morning?" Eret didn't exactly believe Tubbo, but he nodded along anyway.

"You probably need to eat something, you lost quite a lot of blood buddy." Tubbo looked slightly scared before nodding quietly. "Where's the food?"

"I... Don't know?" Eret then pulls out her bag and tries to find anything, they eventually find a few baked potatos.

Tubbo reaches out for the potatos his hand shaking slightly, there were only three but he was still panicking slightly. He could always throw it up, right? He slowly eats a little bit uncomfortable with Eret staring at him.

Once Tubbo is finished he says something about needing to go to the bathroom and tries to get up, but his legs then give up on him slightly and he falls. "I think you might of hit a nerve when you got cut, you probably shouldn't go anywhere without support."

"Of course this happens to me..."

"I think it's best you just rest today."

"Can I please go out."

"You know you can't"

"I want to go apologise to Tommy." Eret isn't sure wether to be suprised or not, Tubbo wasn't being transphobic what was Quackity talking about? "I really mucked up, why do I trust Dream. I'm an idiot."

"I've trusted Dream before, and now I can't help my friends without being throwing away anything. Don't feel too bad."

"Yeah... I guess."

"You need your rest."

"Can I please go Eret."

"I don't even know the last time you properly ate, and a few potatoes doesn't count."

"I- How did you?"

"I was going through your chests trying to find food."

"Ohh..." The two sat in silence for a while.

"Are you okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"You had cuts on your arm and you don't eat nearly enough."

"I think I'm okay." Tubbo looks at Eret again. "Can I please go see Tommy?"

"Tubbo- I- You know I can't let you."

"Please Eret."

“Fine, but promise me you’ll eat more okay?”

“I’ll try.”

“Okay, so you are going to have to use me as a support unless you have any crutches?”

“No.”

Tubbo then reaches an arm around Eret and they both go limping over to the portal. The portal is what Eret was scared of, it felt uncomfortable enough being healthy but Tubbo hadn’t eaten in a while.

As they go through the portal Eret kept their eye on him, making sure Tubbo wasn’t uncomfortable at all. He seemed fine though so they continued down the path being careful, neither of them knew what would happen when Tommy saw Tubbo but they hoped nothing to bad happened.

After going through the portal and making sure Tubbo was okay, he led Tubbo down to Logstenshire. When they went into the fence Tommy was in there tapping at a bell.

“Tommy?” Eret hears Tubbo whisper beside him. “Tommy, I’m sorry.”

Tommy turns around to see Tubbo leaning on Eret, he saw dried blood on Tubbos clothes so he was slightly concerned. “Tubbo? What are you doing here?”

“I’m so sorry Tommy, I was scared after seeing Ranboo I- I know I shouldn’t have done it but, I was scared.”

“What could Dream do to you? You’re president after all.”

“Exactly, I’m can’t do anything to him. But he can do anything to me.”

“Tubbo I-” Tommy wasn’t sure wether to believe him or not, the voice in his head was telling him not too. 

‘He betrayed you.’  
‘He sided with Dream.’  
‘He’s only doing this because of Eret.”

Tommy wasn’t sure what to do, he just went to what he knew best. Yelling. “TUBBO, I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU AT LEAST FELT A LITTLE BIT SORRY FOR ME IN EXILE. YOU NEVER CAME VISITED ME, YOU STAYED WITH YOUR BROTHER. YOU THEN EXILED ME AGAIN BECAUSE DREAM SAID SO WHAT THE ACTUAL F#CK?”

“I’m sorry Tommy.”

“I BET YOUR ONLY HERE BECAUSE ERET FORCED YOU TOO, GO BACK TO L’MANBERG AND YOUR F#CKING BROTHER YOU P#SSY.”

“Eret didn’t want me to come at all, I forced him to come.”

“YOU ACTUALLY SUCK, I BET YOU WERE HAPPY BACK IN L’MANBERG WHILE I WAS STUCK HERE WITH DREAM. YOU MUST HAVE HAD SO MUCH FUN.” Tommy saw Phil and Ranboo come back, he didn’t care to much. All he could focus on was Tubbo betraying him.


	22. Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Selfharm is implied, Torture is discussed, Child abuse, Transphobia is talked about

Phil was slightly worried about what was going on, he didn't want Tubbo to be hurt by Tommy. He ran in to pull Tommy back, he had both his arms held behind his back.

"Oh f#ck off Phil."

"Tommy, you really should listen to Tubbo." Phil looked up, Eret had also stepped in. Phil had a look of suprise? Painted across his face. "And Phil you should let Tommy go." Phil let go of Tommy but glared at Eret.

"Tommy, please listen I didn't know. I was scared of Dream too, he's my brother I've seen the sh#t he can do to people." Tubbo then gestured over to Ranboo. "Look at Ranboo, that's not even the worst he's done to someone."

"Sure, whatever you say Mr. President."

"What else could I have done?"

"You could have- Ranboo was hurt, you should have done something."

"Just because he's my brother doesn't mean he won't hurt me, in fact it probably would be worse considering I would have "betrayed" the family."

Tommy was at a bit of a loss for words, Tubbo does have a point. What could he have done? Why was he even yelling at Tubbo, he's seen the f#cked up sh#t he has done. 

"You still f#cking deadnamed him, Schlatt." Tubbo flinched slightly at Phil calling him that, and looked away a bit in shame.

"I didn't know, I didn't know what was going on. I was scared Dream would hurt me if I stepped out of line." Tubbos hands began to drift and draw a light line across his chest, it was just below the burn he got from the fireworks. No one seemed to notice it though.

"Phil, focus on your on child. If you can even call him that. Tubbo has a right to be scared, I was mad at him at first too. It had been taken out of context when it was told to me."

"So he doesn't get punished at all? He just gets away with this?"

"He is a child Phil, a 17 year old what do you want me to do?"

"Exile him too, you are king after all."

"I suggest you leave Phil, your opinion isn't wanted here."

Phil glared at Eret, he grabbed Tommy's wrist and beginning to pull him out. Tommy winced in pain and tried to get out of Phil's grasp but it just hurt more, he was a sure a few of the cuts must have been reopened.

"Phil, let go please..." Tommy had tears in his eyes, he didn't want to leave with Phil. He wanted to stay here with Ranboo, Eret and Tubbo too.

"I'm not leaving you here."

"Phil please- it hurts." Phil lets go and slightly pushes Tommy away. 

"Stay here with those transphobic b#tches then." With that Phil storms off into the forest, leaving Tommy on the ground holding his arm.

Once Phil had left Eret jumped into action, she first helped Tubbo over to the blue tent. They then run towards Tommy, he lightly holds Tommy's arm trying not to touch where the blood is coming from. She holds the tip of the sleeve, about to pull it back before thinking for a second. "Can I look?"

"Yes." Tommy sounded like he was in a lot of pain so they slowly push the fabric up his wrist. It seemed like he would only need to get bandages because the cut wasn't that deep, it probably hurt mostly from the fabric rubbing against it.

"Ranboo, do you know where the bandages are?"

"Yes, I'll go get them."

Eret then continued to talk to Tommy trying to take his mind of the pain, Ranboo then ran up beside her and handed them the bandages. Eret then carefully wrapped his wrist in bandages, he then tucked in the left over.

"Does anyone else stay here?"

"Fundy recently moved here."

"Ok, Ranboo I need you to go find Fundy I'm going to take everyone back to my castle and we can talk there." Ranboo quickly nodded and skipped off.

————

Eret was supporting Tubbo by the portal while Tommy was putting a bag of his stuff together, they were all waiting for Ranboo to return with Fundy.

After about five minutes they saw two figures running towards them, it looked like they were chasing each other. As the duo came closer and closer they could finally see who they were, Fundy was running right at them with Ranboo behind seemingly shouting at him.

"Tubbo, what the f#ck are you doing here."

"I'm sorry, I'm- I was a coward."

"I'll explain everything later, I'm taking everyone back to my castle. You can come if you want Fundy but I can't force you."

"No way do I want to anywhere go with Tubbo." Tommy was staying uncharacteristically quiet, in fact he had for the whole afternoon.

"Okay, I can't force you. Just know you are welcome." Eret the pauses to then see Tommy stand up silently and go through the portal. Eret then helps Tubbo who was now rather pale from the outing, through the portal.

Ranboo followed behind them and the four travelled back to The Greater Esempe. Eret was very worried for all of them, they were all only children and both Tommy and Tubbo self harm and Ranboo was tortured by Dream. She was very worried about Tommy, he is never this quiet.

After arriving at the castle he takes them to two spare rooms. "Two people will have to share, but I would prefer if Tubbo was alone."

"Tommy and I will be fine with sharing a room then."

"I used to have another room, but HBomb recently moved in. Don't mind him too much though."

Ranboo smiles and then leads Tommy into the larger of the two room, it was a nice room with two single beds, a bookshelf, a painting and a few other bits and bobs.

Eret then helps Tubbo into his room, the room is pretty much the same as the other but only one bed and a bit smaller. They then help Tubbo into bed, Tubbo looked like they would pass out any second now. "Don't try to leave the bed, I will be up in the morning with food. Good night Tubbo."

"Goodnight Eret." He smiled slightly before closing the door, she then goes to Tommy and Ranboos room. The two of them were sitting on their beds laughing. "Goodnight you two, don't forget to get some sleep." Eret half closes the door before poking his head back in. "And Tommy make sure you take off your binder." 

"Goodnight Eret!" Ranboos happy voice still filled with laughter.

She missed this. Running around with Tubbo and his bees, reading Tommy books that he would try to eat because they were to boring and educational in his words.

Before a child was put in charge of a country, before children were exiled for small mistakes; before children were tortured...


	23. Food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Self-harm, Mentioned past anorexia, Bulimia, Child abuse (More just referenced past scars though), Panic attack
> 
> CW: Food
> 
> Also there is an important notice at the end for people who want to get to know my universe and how it works more. :D

Tommy open his eyes expecting to see the side of Ghostbur's tent, instead they were in a cobblestone room with Ranboo across the room. He began to recount what happened the day before, he hopes he could trust Tubbo. After all he knew what Dream was like, he was probably right about how much Dream would hurt him. Look at what happened to Ranboo.

Tommy pushed the blankets off him and stood up, his eyes quickly wondered around the room before landing on the door. He lifted his hand to touch cold metal that he quickly pulled away from, the cold almost stung a bit. Tommy waited for a few seconds before grabbing the handle again, he pushed it open and shivered as the cold air hit him.

He put his hand against the wall and followed it along, the sharp rocks chipped at his fingers but by now they were numb. He came up to an open window and looked out, it wasn't even that dark. The sun was rising over the horizon slowly, but not enough to let any light into the castle. Tommy made his way towards where he knew the stairs were, he saw a figure standing at the gate looking out.

"Good morning?"

"Oh, morning Tommy." Eret turned around smiling at him.

"What are we going to do now?"

"What do you want to do?"

"I- um... I don't know?" Eret looked at him with her head slightly tilted, this wasn't the Tommy they used to know. Tommy used to know what he wanted to do all the time, and when he didn't he would say so more confidently.

"Why don't we see what the others want to do?"

"I guess..." Eret noticed Tommy was almost upset? 

"I'll make breakfast now, are the others up yet?" Tommy just shook his slightly head, he then just turned around and headed towards the courtyard.

Eret turned around and went to the kitchen, the wooden floors slightly creaked below him as she had gone down this way so many times. The kitchen was a circular room with no windows, it had a table in the middle and a bench that went around to create an outline. They pulled a flint and steel out of his bag and grabbed the torch, she blew off the ashes and lit it against before putting it back on the wall. They grabbed a book and quill from one of the chests that were placed under the counters, he quickly skimmed through it the uneven light making it hard to read.

She turned to a page for pancakes and got all the ingredients that they would need, he then got some coal and placed it in the furnace. She then set the coal on fire too, they wanted it to a high enough temperature so that they didn't take that long to cook. He pulled out a small bowl and slowly put flour, sugar, baking powder and salt to whisk, after it one complete texture she set it to the side.

Eret then pulled out another medium bowl, they were more careful this time adding milk, butter and egg making sure not to spill any. After whisking it up again, he added the dry ingredients making sure nothing splashed. The other two times she mixed it, it hadn't mattered to much but this time they didn't want to over mix it. Once it was finished there were only a few bumps.

He pulled the pan over to herself and poured the mixture in, they then put it into the furnace balancing it on the bars above the flames. 

After a few minutes, and several pancakes being cooked he threw sand on the flames. She then made their way to the courtyard to see Tommy and Ranboo, Eret smiled sligtly. He had no idea what brought them so close together but it wasn't her place to pry.

"Breakfast is ready, its down in the kitchen," The two looked up at him and nodded slightly. "I am taking Tubbo's food up to him, I don't want him walking too much."

"Okay." Ranboo smiled then Tommy grabbed his hand and led him towards the kitchen.

Okay, now Eret was definitely worried about Tommy. 

They then turned towards the stair balancing a plate in his hand, it was one of her few plastic plates but they had read somewhere that red plates/bowls could help with eating disorders. He made his way to Tubbo's door and pulles it open, inside was Tubbo staring off out his window.

"Good morning Tubbo!"

"Morning..." Eret could see him eyeing the single pancake they had for him.

"I know it's hard Tubbo, but I will be here with you." Tubbo smiled and cautiously reached out for the plate and fork. Eret had already cut it up for him, she wasn't sure if giving someone who has recently self-harmed a knife even if it was only a butter knife.

Tubbo poked at it and looked up at Eret, he knew he had tears in his eyes. In fact he had avoided food for so long he couldn't remember the taste of anything. Eret sat down next to him and began to hum, Tubbo tried to concentrate on Eret and not the food but it was so hard. After a few minutes he finally worked up the courage to take one bite, but right after he felt sick and his mind was telling him to throw it up.

"Tubbo, after everything you worked for..."

"You don't deserve food, think of what Tommy must have gone through."

"Throw it up, you can go another day."

"What would Tommy think of you."

"What about Ranboo?"

"Or Eret, do you think he really cares about you?"

"He wants to destroy your progress."

"What would your brother think? Wasting the food..."

"No..." Tubbo whispered he had tears pouring down his cheeks, he didn't want this why did Eret make him do this? He felt something grab his hand but he didn't care to look at it, he could only focus on the food. That food had caused him so much, he really didn't deserve it.

"Tubbo, I'm here... I know how hard it can be..." Eret's voice sounded so soothing, Tubbo almost believed it but the voices were right. He didn't deserve it, Eret was lying to him; they wanted him to ruin his progress. "Tubbo listen to my voice, I want you to breathe with me."

Tubbo took a breath in trying to follow Eret's, his breath became to fast and his hands came to his stomach. That's what happened last time, he didn't want to eat Dream would find out... Dream was right, he should have left Tommy with Dream. Wait, no what was he thinking?

"Tubbo! Can you hear me?" Tubbo nodded slightly and felt himself being pulled to the side, closer to Eret. That's what Dream used to do too, Dream used to be a great brother. But Schlatt got to him, Tubbo was scared of him after that. Tubbo tried to breathe again, it was so hard his mind was racing to fast.

Slowly Tubbo's breathing began to slow down to a more normal pace, he looked down at the rest of the food and felt sick again. Eret was going to get him to eat more, wasn't he?

"Tubbo, if you want you can eat the rest later. I will leave it in the kitchen because there aren't any canonical flies or other bugs because the author is lazy." Tubbo looked up at them in surprise, he wasn't going to have to eat this?

"I would like that a lot, thank you Eret."

"Now, I was thinking I get you some crutches today." Tubbo smiled and nodded, he was sick of having to rely on Eret to go anywhere. Eret then helped him get out of bed and supported him on the way down to Tommy and Ranboo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Eret cooks food for everyone and goes up to give Tubbo his, Tubbo then has a panic attack because of the idea of eating and his past.
> 
> HOW MY UNIVERSE WORKS
> 
> I know people skip past these so I put it in bold.
> 
> Also I saw some people confused on how the universe I have created works so here is a quick explanation because I doubt I will have a time to explain it in the future.
> 
> Imagine lots of floating islands with a bubble over them/the world border, each of these are technically a server but they are also treated like countries. To get from island to island you exit the border there is one door each side so NSEW, each side has a bridge that will lead you to another server. The more popular the server is the closer to the middle it will be, and depending how many people go and how often people go to other certain servers that is where the island will be. So the Esempe/SMP is close to MCC because of how many of them attend.
> 
> If you have anymore questions feel free to comment!


End file.
